on the perimeter

mine is not to follow you
nor to walk in your shadow
i cannot hold your hand
i cannot watch your back

my life is that which is my own
solitary and alone
i will die without you
and so i must live without you

i know you want a different song
you want something more
something less than perfect
but i can only be as i am

don’t you think it’s hard for me
to ask you this
to delve into your soul
and return with nothing

don’t you know how it breaks my heart
to show you your aloneness
in the false neon of attachment
what is the test of my love?

moonlight and roses, dinner and diamonds
followed by tears
starlight coming through our window
wind drying the sweat from our skin

what can be more perfect than the vessel
broken, cracked, fragmented
beyond recognition
would you glue it together again?

i stand outside of the sky
and there are no stars here
love of mine,
how brave are you?


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